the most beautiful troll rp

CG: CAPTORCAPTORCAPTOR

TA: what do you want

CG: ALL THE ICE CREAM IS GONE. AND WELL. WE ALL THINK YOU ATE IT ALL.

TA: god you 2tupiid fuck2 everytiime the iice cream goe2 mii22iing you're all 2O quiick two blame me. doe2 thii2 count a2 dii2criimiinatiion or 2ome 2hiit?

CG: WELL MAYBE IF YOU DIDN'T EAT SO MUCH OF THE GODDAMN FUCKING ICE CREAM WE WOULDN'T BE FUCKING BLAMING YOU.

TA: II DIIDN'T 2EE YOUR NAME ON IIT, A22HOLE.

CG: SO YOU DID EAT IT ALL?

TA: …2hiit.

CG: SEE CAPTOR. THIS IS WHY WE BLAME YOU FOR EATING IT ALL. BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW YOU LOVE THAT ICE CREAM.

TA: ju2t

2hut up and get more okay

GC: NO 1T COULDN'T H4V3 B33N SOLLUX. 1T W4S SP1D3RTROLL.

TA: 2ee? tz doe2n't thiink that iit'2 me. iit'2 obviiou2ly vrii2ka, ii'2 ALWAY2 vrii2ka, riight?

CG: I'M NOT BUYING YOU ANYMORE ICE CREAM. YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GO OUT AND BUY IT YOURSELF. I HAVE HAD TO GO OUT FIVE TIMES TO BUY MORE ICE CREAM THIS WEEK.

TA: plea2e?

CG: ..VRISKA DOESN'T EVEN LIKE ICE CREAM. TEREZI THINKS EVERYTHING IS VRISKA'S FAULT.

TA: and ii wiilliing two agree wiith that conclu2iion mo2t of the tiime.

CC: O)( Sollux!!! Did you like my cuttlefish ice-cream? Glub!
I'll )(ave to make more!

TA: angelfii2h

AC: :33< sollux its no fur you get to eat all of the ice cream! DD:<

TA: no, not you two, GOD.

don't you eat dead thiing2 or 2omethiing?

MY IICE CREAM II2 NOT DEATH FLAVORED.

AT: uH, iS IT HOMESTUCK TIME IN YOUR ASK BOX, JENLUX,

TA: TAVRO2 PLEA2E LEAVE II'M 2ORT OF BU2Y HERE.

GC: SHUT UP K4RK4T! /K1CKS K4RK4T

TA: tz have ii ever told you that you're pretty cool?

you 2hould

kiick hiim agaiin

you know

for fun

AC: DD:< well i would like to try it at least!

TA: well then you 2hould a2k KK two get 2ome more then

AT: bUT I WAS JUST COMING TO, uH, sEE HOW YOU ARE,

iF THAT IS OKAY WITH YOU, i MEAN,

TA: oh

that'2 niice of you, ii gue22 that'2 okay.

hey can you a2k KK two get more iice cream, ii'm larpiing eriidan over here.

ii want iice cream iin all of my quadrant2.

CG: OW! WHAT THE FUCK TEREZI. AND WHY THE FUCK DO YOU WANT HER TO KICK ME AGAIN CAPTOR. THIS IS WHY I'M NOT BUYING YOU ICE CREAM.

TA: KIICK HIIM HARDER TZ

AC: :33< karkitty will you go get me some ice cream? h33h33

TA: KK how can you re2ii2t that face?

AT: oH YES I WILL CERTAINLY ASK KARKAT FOR MORE ICE CREAM,

kARKAT IT WOULD BE NICE, uH, iF YOU GOT ICE CREAM AGAIN FOR THE REST OF US,

iF YOU WOULD CHOOSE TO GO, uH, i DO NOT WANT TO MAKE YOU,

wAS THAT GOOD SOLLUX,

TA: okay iif ii can get everyone two a2k hiim for iit maybe thii2 wiill work.

thank2 tavro2 that wa2 wonderful.

TC: WhOa wHaT ThE MoThErFuCk iS GoInG On iN HeRe?

TA: hey gamzee do you liike iice cream

AC: :33< h33h33, yeah karkitty!

TA: oh man 2he'2 ju2t 2o cute that ii'm about ready two get up and get iice cream for her my2elf.

DO NOT RE2II2T, KK.

GC: /K1CKS K4RK4T 4G4IN

TA: ehehehehehe

ii could do thii2 all day.

AT: tHANKS SOLLUX,

nOW TO SEE IF IT MADE KARKAT, uH, gET THE ICE CREAM THAT WE SO DESIRE,

TA: THE MA22E2 DEMAND IICE CREAM

CA: captor, wwhat the fuck. did you eat all the ice cream?

TA: yeah what are you goiing two do about iit, bottom feeder?

CA: fef wwould you like me to go an get you some ice cream
wwould you fill buckets wwith me if i got you ice cream fef

also solllux you are not allowwed to "answwer" this because i am using you as a middleman betwween me and fef ok

TA: wow thii2 ii2 pathetiic

CG: FFFFF. FINE. I'LL GO BUY ICE CREAM. BUT IT'S ONLY BECAUSE OF NEPETA! NOT YOU CAPTOR.

TA: you ju2t keep on 2ayiing that two your2elf.

thank you KK.

CC: I am going to make a double batc)( t)(is time glub!
Try not to eat it all in one go, or you'll get a tummy ac)(e!

TA: but iit'2 2o good

how do you expect me two not eat two much when iit'2 2O GOOD

CG: THE FUCK. CAPTOR STOP TELLING TEREZI TO KICK ME BEFORE I CHANGE MY MIND.

TA: okay tz that'2 good…

…for now.

AC: :33< i thought sea dwwellers or whatever didnt like ice cream?

TA: maybe they diidn't but they developed a ta2te for iit 2omewhere along the liine?

AC: :33< h33h33 thank you karkitty!

TA: ii thiink that you 2hould hug hiim

forcefully

TC: FuCk yEaH I LiKe iCe cReAm, ThAt sHiT Is tHe mOtHeRfUcKiN' sHiT DuDe, FuCk!

TA: well KK ii2 gettiing u2 2ome.

want two joiin u2 iin makiing KK do all of our chore2?

CC: Tell Eridan to GO AWAY please!
I do not want to fill buckets wit)( )(im! 38(

TA: hey eriidan diid iit hurt

WHEN 2HE BURNED YOU RIIGHT THERE

AC: :33<*ac hugs karkitty forcefurrly* h33h33!

TA: TWO HARD AC TWO HARD HII2 EYE2 ARE BULGIING OUT OH GOD

CA: sollux, i swwear. if you eat all the ice cream again, i'm going to kill you.

TA: yeah you'd liike that, wouldn't you.

go away eriidan, ii don't want two be back wiith your pathetiic dor2al fiin. ii have iice cream iin all of my quadrant2.

CG: I'M BACK WITH THE ICE CREAM. THERE IS 4. DON'T EAT THEM ALL IN ONE SHOT.

TA: MU2T

RE2II2T

URGE

TC: I DoN'T FuCkInG KnOw, DoEs mY MoThErFuCkInG BeSt fRiEnD WaNt tO Do tHoSe cHoReS?

TA: of cour2e he doe2. he II2 your be2t friiend after all, ehehehe.

AT: oH, kARKAT IS GOING TO DO CHORES FOR US,

wOULD YOU MIND, uH, tELLING HIM THAT I HAVE FALLEN ONCE MORE ON STAIRS, aND, uH, i WOULD LIKE SOME HELP BACK UP,

i WOULD ALSO TAKE GAMZEE FOR HELP OR EQUIUS,

iT IS REALLY LONELY ON THESE STAIRS,

TA: hey gamzee go help your poor defectiive friiend, ii'm two bu2y bathiing iin thiis decadent daiiry goodne22.

AC: :33< 33k! *ac backs off* sorry! )):

TA: fuck ii thought you were goiing two kiill hiim!

and whiile KK ii2 a biit of a bulgeweed at time2, he'2 2tiill my 2tupiid friiend.

CG: OH GOD NEPETA YOU'RE HUGGING ME TOO HARD. I'M SUFFOCATING. GET OFF.

TA: 2he'2 backiing off, 2he'2 backiing off.

2hiit ii thought that your eye2 were goiing two pop out.

CA: fuck you sollux
come on fef just one bucket please
ill evven glub like you like me to do see? glub glub glub or wwhatevver
maybe sollux and i can fill one with our radical neww kismesis ship

TA: waiit

what

thii2 ii2 new2 two me.

AC: :33< *ac swipes some before ta can get it all* X33

TA: agh, fiine go ahead, ii only got iit becau2e of you ii gue22.

CG: NO GAMZEE. I DON'T LIKE DOING THESE CHORES! I HATE THEM.

TA: you love them.

you love them 2o much KK.

AC: :33<*ac rubs up against pawllux lovingly* h33h33 look sollux i even found you a nickname!

TA: pawllux

pawllux

PAWLLUX

TC: WeLl fUcK! kArKaT, gEt tO WoRk oR I'Ll bOp yOu oN ThE HeAd wItH My cLuB! >)

TA: ehehehe, liike you would ever do that.

CG: CAPTOR. WHAT THE FUCK. WHY THE FUCK DO YOU WANT ME DEAD.

TA: ii never 2aiid that! ii ju2t told her two hug you

forcefully

forcefully wiith love.

CG: IT'S OKAY, NEPETA.

TA: and then they porked.

CC: Eridan, your glubs need to be from t)(e )(----EART!
Not t)(at I would fill buckets wit)( you if even if t)(ey were...

TA: cc, maybe you could

glub for me

AT: kARKAT, pLEASE COME HELP ME BACK UP,

i PROMISE IT, uH, wILL BE THE ONLY CHORE I ASK YOU TO DO,

uNLESS YOU WANT TO DO MORE, i MEAN,

TA: he would be deliighted two.

CG: BUT I HATE THESE CHORES, GAMZEE.

TA: biig 2cary clown wiill bop you iif you don't though! oooooh aren't you 2cared?

AC: :33<yeah! pawllux, isnt is just adorable!

TA: ii don't know iif ii want two puke or coo.

CA: but fef
glub glub glub glub glub
ill even use those fish puns you like!
cod you fill buckets with me if i use those?

glub

also sollux get your lowwblood ass ovver here its bucket time

TA: oh my god 2TOP THE FII2H PUN2 they aren't cute comiing from you.

eriidan giive me one good rea2on why ii 2hould put thii2 iice cream down and pretend two lii2ten two you.

TC: I GoT My cLuB RiGhT HeRe, KaRkAt. I'Ll gIvE YoU A RiGhT BaSh oN ThE NoGgIn iF YoU DoN'T Do tHoSe cHoReS! >)

TA: eheheheh, wow gamzee are you

uh

2eriiou2?

AC: :33<*ac sighs* no, you just don't understand. also me at karkitty are not porking or whatever! DD:<

TA: oh my mii2take.

CC: Glub, glub, glub!!!
Like t)(is?
)(e)(e)(e.

TA: ye2.

you are two good two me you know that riight?

CG: I'LL HELP YOU GET UP THE STAIRS, TAVROS. BUT I'M NOT DOING ANYMORE CHORES. ESPECIALLY NO MORE FUCKING CHORES FOR YOU, CAPTOR!

TA: WOW KK RUDE.

RUDE2T FRIIEND.

CG: OKAY, GAMZEE. OKAY. CALM DOWN. I'M GOING TO DO THE CHORES.

TA: good man.

TC: I'M NoT GoNnA FuCkIn' WeLl hUrT HiM! jUsT A LiTtLe bAnG On tHe hEaD. )

TA: ok then

you were 2tartiing two actually make me nervou2 for a 2econd.

ehehe maybe ii'm ju2t beiing dumb.

AC: :33< unless.. i guess.. karkitty wants to

TA: THE PLOT THIICKEN2

AT: hEHE, tHANKS KARKAT,

i REALLY APPRECIATE YOUR HELP, uH, yOU ARE A REALLY GOOD FRIEND,

(pLEASE DO BE NICE TO SOLLUX THOUGH,)

TA: wow everyone ii2 2o niice today

ii2 iit the iice cream

we 2hould have iice cream

every

DAY

CG: I'M ONLY BEING RUDE BECAUSE YOU'RE BEING A SHITTY FRIEND. LOOK. THERE'S ONLY 3 ICE CREAM JARS LEFT. I BOUGHT /FIVE./

TA: YOU BOUGHT FOUR YOU DUMBA22

CA: come captor
lets go pail hard core
fuck fef
<3<

TA: II NEED AN ADULT

TC: *Bashes Karkat on the head*
WhOa tHaT WaS WeIrDlY FuN.
kArKaT My mAn, CaN I Do tHaT AgAin? )

TA: whoa man

ju2t

take a chiill piill alriight?

AC: :33< but i dont think karkitty likes me like that.. (

TA: here let me 2et you up on a candleliight flu2h date

can ii be the guru of love



yeah okay ii can't 2ay that wiith a 2traiight. that'2 a laugh and half ii2n't it.

CG: I BOUGHT FOUR, BUT THERE WAS ANOTHER IN THE FREEZER, AND I PUT IT ON THE TABLE, SO IT COUNTS AS FIVE.

TA: KK 2hut up you ju2t can't count.

CA: maybe wwe can try roleplaying like nepeta
*eridan drags sollux into a closet and they pail hard core*

TA: waiit what are you

where are you

OH GOD WHAT II2-

FUCK

CC: Sollux! Don't listen to Eridan )(e is just using you! 38(
)(e will just t)(row you away like a dried up jellyfis)( w)(en )(e's finished with you!

TA: FF II'M IIN THE CLO2ET HELP

CG: CAPTOR WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING YOU BEING A LOVE GURU. WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN KNOW ABOUT LOVE!

TA: KK PLEA2E JU2T OPEN THE CLO2ET DOOR II NEED HELP

CA: *sollux enjoys pailing wwith eridan wwell more like he hates it but he still enjoys it*

TA: YOU 2HUT YOUR FII2HY WHORE MOUTH

AC: :33< oh pawllux, would you?

oh
you were joking.

TA: ac ii'm not 2ure iif you notiiced but



ii 2ort of 2uck at relatiion2hiip2.

TC: WhAt iF I DoN'T WaNt tO TaKe a cHiLl pIlL, mOtHeRfUcKeR.
wHaT ThEn?

TA: hey man KK'2 lii2teniing two you now ju2t

ju2t relax alriight?

CA: *eridan puts his male parts into one of solluxs eyes because eridan has looked through solluxs computer wwhen he wwasnt looking and knowws he looks at this kind of pail porn*

TA: AWWW BALL2

CG: /SWINGS OPEN CLOSET DOOR

TA: KK

ii want you two 2tay calm

iit'2 ju2t

a diick iin my eye

iit'2 totally

normal

cod fuckiing why

CG: WHAT THE FUCK GAMZEE! NO YOU CAN'T DO THAT AGAIN. GO BASH SOLLUX OR SOMETHING. OR EAT SLIME. I DON'T KNOW. GO DO JUGGALO THINGS.

TA: wow

rude two my head

CC: O)( NO!
IT'S OK MY LITTL---E C)(ROMIS I'M COMING!
*Feferi pulls open the closet door and s)(oves )(er trident in the fis)(y bullies face demanding )(e let Sollux go*

TA: THII2 II2 IINCREDIIBLY 2IILLY

TC: MaYbE I DoN'T WaNt tO ReLaX. mAyBe i'm jUsT FuCkIn' WeLl fInE As i fUcKiN' wElL Am, cApToR.

TA: ok ii'm ju2t goiing two

go

over there now.

AC: :33< *ac sighs and tries to go with a more dirrect apurroach* karkitty will you be my matesprit? *ac is nervous*

TA: AC PLEA2E II'M 2TUCK IIN A CLO2ET CAN THII2 WAIIT

CA: fef!
go awway youre ruining my pail time
you too kar

TA: II THIINK II'M CRYIING BLOOD

SEAHORSEDAD: SON.
FIRST THE CROSSDRESSING, NOWW THIS?

TA: 2EAHOR2E DAD HELP ME

CT: D --> Sollu% this is very 100d behavior and you will stop it forthwith
D --> Also I have graciously used some of my milk to make you ice cream
D --> I believe appleberry blast is the flavor you prefer if I am not much mistaken
D --> Do not read too much into this I just want everyone to cease their f001ish whining

TA: equiiu2

can thii2 waiit

when ii'm not driippiing eye goo everywhere?

although that iice cream doe2 2ound awfully good riight now.

TC: Oh nO, wHeRe tHe mOtHeRfUcK ArE YoU GoInG? (
ThAt's... AwFuLlY RuDe oF YoU, fRiEnD. >(

TA: gamzee ii am currently 2tuck iin a clo2et wiith a homiiciidal cloacatard'2 diick in my eye

CC: ERIDAN PL---EAS---E!
I will fill a bucket wit)( you if you promise to leave Sollux alone!!!! 38(

TA: no no no no don't do that no

SEAHORSEDAD: SON. I DEMAND YOU TO LET THE POOR BOY GO.
HOWW DID I RAISE SUCH A FAILURE.

TA: 2eahor2e dad ii'm iin love wiith you riight now

CG: NEPETA.. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.. UH.. WELL..


..
YES.

TA: well thii2 ii2 2weet and heart warmiing

try not two 2liip on my eye on your way out

CA: fuck you dad
i guess i should just go
since no one here likes me
right

TA: yeah you're riight

no one liike2 you

lea2t of all me you contemptiible ba2tard

………

<3<

CG: CAPTOR YOU MENTALLY SCARRED ME. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THAT WITH ERIDAN. WHY.

TA: ii diidn't have much of a choiice!!

SEAHORSEDAD: WWELL, HE IS MY FAILURE
SO I HAVVE TO MAKE UP FOR HIS LACK OF
ALL GOOD QUALITIES

YOUVVE SEEN THOSE PICTURES OF HIM IN THAT SKIRT THING AND THE PIGTAILS RIGHT?

TA: ii uh

ahem

ye2

ii have.

CT: D --> I am leaving the ice cream in the cold storage cube
D --> Your wanton display of oc001ar fornication has made me
D --> Perspire

TA: OH MY GOD GET OUT II'M ALREADY DRENCHED IIN EYE JUIICE

AC: :33<*ac squeals in excitement and hugs karkitty but not too forcefurlly h33h33*

TA: oh you ju2t stepped on my eye riight there

ii thiink iit'2 cryiing

CA: wwhat
sollux you fuckin matesprit stealin fuckin bipolar loser

hate you too

TA: oh

well then

okay confliict re2olved maybe you guy2 2hould

go now

ii don't need help anymore

ye2

AC: :33< maybe you could ask equius to make you some robot eyes!

TA: wow how about ii don't.

that take2 the fun out of iit

TC: ThAt's... AwFuL, bRo. WaNt mE To sOrT HiM OuT FoR YoU? >)

TA: nah ii thiink we have

worked thiing2 out, two 2ay.

THEN JENNA LOST ONE FOLLOWER FROM THAT.

Anons' identities reveled in description.